Mamma’s Home! The aftermath….

Wow what a weekend! My first time away from Leia since she was born, and it went great!  So well I know I can do it again in the future!

I will leave the Tony Robbins conference out of this, that is like a whole other blog, suffice it to say it was way better than I expected, super challenging and stretching and I am ready to do another one in the future! Also, it was jam packed, so no time to miss a little princess too much, so that is probably a good thing for a mom’s first time away.

It was so amazing to see Leia when I got back, she just couldn’t stop smiling and neither could I. Also amazing to know David took care of her that whole time and you know she was not only alive but thriving 🙂 Of course, my house didn’t look totally the way I would have it look (but not the demilitarized zone I was expecting!) and Leia definitely looked like a bath or two had been skipped (so curious what she wore while I was gone?) and I was dismayed to see the HUGE box of disposable diapers in her room. I knew he was going disposable while I was gone, but for some reason he bought the most gigantic box. I also have noticed a spike in food pouch addiction, now she goes to the fridge signing more for them like crazy, and of course the Dad who wanted zero TV in Leia’s life said “I really like Blue’s Clue’s” and when I opened a cupboard strangely enough, half of Leia’s shoe collection was inside it with my pots and pans?

I think it is such an awesome thing for me to know he can take care of her, really take care of her though! I notice since coming back he has a lot more initiative when it comes to her too, it is easy for mom’s to just take over all the baby duties and do them all the time because we are so well practiced at it and I think it is easy for Dad’s to feel a little intimidated, but giving him that one on one time with her I am sure allowed him the freedom to just take care of her in his way. I love that bedtime was followed totally successfully from what he says too:) I love feeling a bit more like we are partners in the mundane aspects of child rearing. I mean there is nobody like Mom of course and we still have our different roles, but it’s great to feel like he understands mine more maybe than he did before.

The other really cool thing coming out of this, I feel more freedom to take better care of myself. I can already see how this conference and time away has made a world of difference in my marriage, so that will flow right into my mothering of course. It is so easy to feel guilty whenever I do something that seems like it is just for me, but the Lord is showing me that this weekend was really not just about me at all. I take care of Leia 24/7 a few weekends a year away or afternoons out once a week are not really selfish, they are energizing so I can keep living a life of service to my family. David is encouraging me to do a few more things like this and I think I may just take him up on it 🙂

It is good to stretch yourself and trust the Lord with your kids (and your husband with them), at least that is what I found out to be true in my life.  I’m amazed at how one weekend away, and one weekend where Leia was with Daddy can just be used to flood our family with good things. Trust, it’s a good thing! I encourage moms who may be facing that first time away from their babes to push themselves, it may be scary at first but if you give up a bit of control it can be a really great thing.

Entering The Daddy Zone

Thursday morning I am getting on a plane. That’s nothing new, why just a couple weeks ago we flew to Colorado and back. This time though, it will be just me, no baby! Leia will be staying with Daddy and I will be getting on a plane to San Jose for the weekend. For a long time this idea totally terrified me. I could break out into a sweat just thinking about it. It is kind of hard to describe, it really is more of a primal fear I had at the thought of leaving my baby overnight for the first time.

She is 15 months old though and it isn’t like she needs mommy milk anymore. Plus, she is staying with Daddy right? This totally terrified me too I have to admit, but now that it is upon me I am feeling less scared (I hope this confidence lasts through Thursday morning!). I can really see how this has been a good thing already. Just because it is hard doesn’t mean it isn’t good after all.

Anyway, David does a lot of seminars and personal development things. In his work as a coach and consultant it really comes into play, and he has always wanted me to go to this Tony Robbins seminar. Now, this wouldn’t be what I would think to do with a weekend off on my own, but it means a lot to David and so I didn’t want to just write it off. He wants me to go because, even though it isn’t Christian and we both know this stuff has to be held at somewhat of a cautious distance in our lives, it has helped him think a lot of things through and he wants me to have the same experience. So I want to honor his care for me and give it a shot, plus, this has been a period of a lot of change for me to be sure so a weekend where I can think about me and my life and my priorities is probably a good thing.

So, David has been practicing going solo with Leia with some long distance Leia days, put her to bed, and I have written down instructions (and am trying to think of any other things I might need to tell him, I am sure I will be sending texts!). This has been good. Leia adores Daddy and they always have a great time together, but it makes me feel good knowing he is getting into some of the nitty gritty details he often doesn’t have to deal with because I am a full time mom and he has a full time job outside the house. Plus, I got to see a movie and had lots of time out of the house 🙂

Also, I feel as a Mom I have to stretch myself sometimes with things that remind me to trust my kids to the Lord. I mean it may seem totally natural to have Dad take care of Leia and it is! But for me, where I am at as a first time Mom, having anyone take over for a weekend is a big deal, but I think it is a bridge I need to cross. I know these things are different for every family, some people leave kids overnight much earlier, some later, some people need proffessional childcare, etc, but we all need to learn to trust at different times and different ways, that the Lord is our Father and we cannot control everything all the time when it comes to our kids.

I am thankful that I get to leave Leia with Daddy for the first time I will be gone overnight. She loves him so much! She gets to stay in her home, and more or less her routine (though I have to allow Daddy some freedom there to be Daddy, I mean this is a special weekend so all my rules may not be followed to the letter 🙂 They get a one on one time they have never had and I am excited for both of them. I look forward to hearing all about it from David! (Not looking forward to what my house may look like afterwards, but as long as everyone is healthy I’m good!)

As for me, I am soooo excited to read on a plane! And I can have my complimentary beverage without worrying about Leia spilling it, and I don’t have to keep her from grabbing anyone in the seat next to us! I won’t do any cooking or cleaning and will have my bed made everyday!

I just have to let go of all the weird fears, like what if Leia gets mad at me or feels abandoned, what if things aren’t the same when I get back, what if she gets hurt or sick, etc etc. Daddy is there! That is enough, and our Father God is there too and that is definitely enough!