Well needless to say getting our first glimpse of the baby at the first ultrasounds was amazing! The little one sure was moving around in there! Hearing the heart beat was a comfort too, there really is a person in there! It was probably really good for David because unlike me he isn’t constantly confronted with being pregnant! I think getting that look is really giving me strength through the nausea and dizziness and fatigue, etc etc. Also, making it even harder to not think about baby scoggins all the time. My mind at work, well its just not at work, I can’t help but feel like “where am I?” “why are you asking me questions?” “Why are all these kids that are not mine constantly talking to me?”. So thankful for God’s timing with all of this and the knowledge that when the baby comes I get to be a Mom first and foremost.
I really can’t stress enough how grateful I am for yesterdays ultrasound, it’s so easy to get discouraged when you are sick all the time and it just really helped me get excited and feel a fresh bond with what is going on inside of me. One small prayer request, though the doctor said I was really healthy in general, they took my blood pressure three times because it was a little high. I have no history of high blood pressure, so they are going to be watching it. Prayers that it just goes down by the next visit and that I don’t have to worry about hypertension or toxemia would be appreciated.
On another note, i often leave my house wondering if I look ridiculous these days. I am feeling increasingly uncomfy in clothes. If I could just wear sweat pants all the time it would be OK, but I can’t. I am not ready for full on maternity pants of course, and I haven’t actually gained any weight (I actually lost a pound) but things are just moving around and expanding I can tell. It’s hard to describe but clothes just are not doing it for me right now. so today I am wearing a maternity T shirt that isn’t too obvious a denim skirt that I can’t explain, it is too big for me, like three sizes too big for me, honestly I do not know why it was in my closet at all, but now it seems like it might work for a transition skirt, and some maternity leggings underneath, they are a little on the baggy side for leggings, but I just want soft and stretchy on all the time! It’s a very awkward phase as far as clothes go to be sure! Everyday is a hunt into my closet for some oversized and clean piece of clothing that I can wear to work. I have decided I am going to go full on maternity clothes just as soon as I can.